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By MEGHAN V. MALLOYStaff Writer 12/02/2007

Kim Curtis was ready to give up. The year was 1999 and the then-30 year-old woman had just returned to her native Maine from Boston to finish college. Curtis had left the bustle of Boston and a serious relationship behind, and felt she was ready for love again after moving home.

It seems like a simple enough ritual anywhere in America: Go to a bar, club or restaurant and mingle until Mr. or Ms. Right comes along. You have a few great conversations, go out to dinner and the next thing you know, you're dating, right?

Not so in central Maine, Curtis said.

"I was sick of everyone knowing everyone else and giving reviews on guys that were single in the area," Curtis said of central Maine's dwindling singles scene before moving to Boston for the first time in the mid-1990s. "When I moved back to Maine in 1999, I discovered that not much had changed."

Curtis said she actively tried to integrate herself into the dating scene in the area, frequenting Pete and Larry's in Waterville, and even driving to Lewiston, Portland and Bangor to find Mr. Right.

"One thing that I noticed about trying to date in Maine is the appearance thing," Curtis said. "Most guys up there are either scarily maintained -- but stuck in the '80s -- or they look like unmade beds."

It's no picnic for single men in the area either, said Hallowell resident John Nies.

"I think (Augusta) is pretty lame," Nies said. "There's just not a lot of options out there."

Nies, a Minnesota-native, said a typical Saturday night for him is "a mix of the (Liberal) Cup and the Wharf," two well-known establishments located in Hallowell.

But in the capital city, Nies said, "there's really nothing around here. This is an awkward capital."

With thousands of legal single folk in the area, however, the ho-hum dating scene is surprising.

There were over 22,000 single men in Kennebec County last year, according to the U.S. Census Bureau, with the majority -- 15,462 to be exact -- never married. There were over 26,900 unmarried gals in the county the same year, with 13,290 of them never having said "I do."

If you include residents who have been divorced or widowed, there are over 48,000 legally single people in Kennebec County, not to mention those at four area colleges -- University of Maine at Farmington, Colby College, University of Maine at Augusta and Thomas College -- that call central Maine home.

So what's contributing to the near-empty dating scene?

"It's unfortunate that the lack of jobs for the entry and middle-level people force many 20-somethings not only to move to Portland, but for those like myself, to leave Maine altogether," said Elizabeth Haskell, an Augusta native who also lived in Portland before moving to New York City.

"It's just my opinion, but I don't think a modern dating pool really exists until you get a wider playing field like Portland," Haskell said. "(Central Maine) isn't really a dating scene."

Nies agreed. He enjoys going to the Old Port district in Portland to meet women and hang out with friends, he said.

"The Old Port is definitely a happening place," Nies said. "You can meet a lot of people just walking down the street around there, but not in Augusta."

Another part of making the most of the dating scene is self-confidence, said Stori Shaw of Augusta.

"I'm not afraid to go out alone sometimes and hang out," she said. "If you're comfortable with yourself, you can be comfortable with anyone," Shaw said, motioning to Scott Russell of Bangor, whom she had just struck up a conversation with last Tuesday night at The Liberal Cup.

Celeste Ross, a Liberal Cup bartender, said the bar usually is a good place for singles to meet.

"We have a lot of regulars who come in every night, and that has created a very warm and inviting atmosphere," Ross said.

For some central Mainers, the dating scene has moved entirely into cyberspace.

Yahoo!.com Personals boasts an extravagant number of single Mainers, with 395 men and 289 women within a 50-mile radius of Augusta, ranging from 18 to 35 years old. The anonymity of a computer gives some singles confidence to talk to strangers.

Yahoo!.com Personals is where Curtis met her husband.

"I always felt safe with the computer because you can ask stuff that might tip you off about the person, as well as have a level of getting to know them before having to share pictures," Curtis said.

Feeling discouraged yet? Don't. It isn't all bumps in the road for central Mainers.

Curtis said she had decided to swear off dating but became intrigued by Phil Curtis, a Presque Isle native she met through Yahoo!.com Personals.

The couple finally met in person just before Curtis graduated from college. Phil said his car had broken down and he needed a ride. If she agreed to help him out, he'd take her for pizza.

"I was wearing sweats, a ponytail, no makeup and took no time improving that," Kim Curtis said. Her future husband seemed to have been like-minded, as he met her in ripped jeans, dirty T-shirt and uncombed hair. What should've been another dating disaster, she said, turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to her.

The couple dated for eight months before becoming engaged. They tied the knot in September 2003.

"The spark was missing until I met my husband," Curtis said. "But, I sure did have fun."

Meghan V. Malloy -- 632-3811 Ext. 431

mmalloy@centralmaine.com

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